I am sure that you can easily think of 10 hardships of raising a child on the spectrum, but I am here to give you 10 positives. You will receive many lessons while raising your children and I promise you will be thankful for the gifts that autism brings into your life.
What memories did I hold on to? I wrote down the memories that came to mind from kindergarten to grade 8, and this is what I came up with.
He was obnoxiously funny, blunt with his words, confidently himself, and always the life of the party. I could not believe half of the shit that came out of his mouth. He said what others wouldn’t or shouldn’t, and I couldn’t get enough!
Constant noise, droves of people, smells, and all kinds of other sensory stimulants will put my kids in a mental coma for days to follow. They will need to rest off all the mental excitement. A holiday from their holiday, so to speak. Of course, I will sacrifice a day of my sanity for them, but it is nothing short of hard.
I believe life would be so much easier if we released half the shit we have bottled up. For all the times we have thought, ‘I wish I had of said….,’ but didn’t. One of the reasons I fell in love with my husband was his sense of humour. However, I must admit, sometimes I internally question the honesty behind his humour. I mean, he looks like he is kidding, but is he really?
Today I woke extremely early, perhaps it’s the ongoing anxiety of our current situation. I am feeling exhausted. I want my mom. Yes, at 44, I still want a hug, some help, and a confidence boost from my mom. Distanced by Provinces and circumstance, I miss her.
As he starts to walk out the door to embark on the next chapter, I am left questioning; Did I do my job? Did I teach him all the lessons that I needed to? Did I raise him to be confident enough to handle what life may throw at him? Will he remember to be passionate and
I’m at the door as requested. Sweatpants, slippers and keys in hand. I’m prepared for the dash to the car. I’ve warmed up, I’ve stuck my ever so patient mama face on. I’m disgustingly sweet and uber positive pumping her up from the doorway. ‘You got this!’ ‘It’ll be great!’